Month of Poetry #5 – haiku

 

white petal guppies take a look

 

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3 thoughts on “Month of Poetry #5 – haiku

  1. I’ve been fascinated with the one line haiku since reading many from Janice Bostock’s collection. I’m unsure if this works. Does it need to be a two (or three) liner? What do you reckon?

  2. I think it works as a one-liner. Rhythmically, to my ear, it might work better as a two-liner only if the plurals are switched:

    white petals
    the guppy takes a look

    But having typed all that, I prefer it as you have it – the one line version!

  3. I think Ash’s two-liner has a great ring to it, but agree that the way you have it is working well. it has a strangeness that keeps drawing you back for repeated reads

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