Tag Archives: ego

“He’s no fisherman”

.

I must have been

about seven.

We would often

go fishing as a family.

This time uncle Dennis

came with us and said

to my folks

in his broad Bristolian accent,

He is no fisherman!”

My mum defended in her

diplomatic way.

I just stood and listened.

.

This piece isn’t about

the small man

my uncle Dennis must have been,

saying this to a

seven year old boy.

Everyone

has had a voice

saying

“You’re not good enough.”

from a teacher, parent or someone.

my question is…

.

Why would my memory

choose

to

remember

t h o s e   w o r d s

from 25 years ago?

.

Why, when my memory

has forgotten countless

better memories like

the scent of the air

between lips as I leaned

in for my first kiss?

Or the feeling of my feet first

standing on a surfboard,

skidding along a moving curve of ocean.

.

Why keep a photo

of uncle ‘I’m not good enough’

on the wall

of my memory?

Why play that scratchy sound recording

so crisply in my

adult ears?

.

It seems so stupid.

.

 

.

Jesus Loves Me

.

Jesus loves me? This you say

I know. You told me yesterday

But is love what I really crave?

I had love from my husband Dave

My kids also in their own way

Pick flowers for me from outside play

No love’s not what I really need

It’s not enough… I’ll admit… it’s greed

No. I don’t want love anymore

So I walked from love and closed the door

Love is extinct… it’s ME I want

With expensive shoes, posh restaurant

You tell me Jesus knows me well

And died for me to escape all hell

But… will Jesus like my post on facebook?

Or profile page? Will he take a look?

Does he share my taste in a girly movie?

Music? Dance? Will he get down groovy?

Tell me I look hot in this dress?

Buy me a drink? Try to impress?

Will he flirt with me? Tell me I’m sexy?

Buy me a diamond. Something exy?

Will Jesus give what I desire?

A glamored life where I feel higher?

I see you’re stunned. I’ve insulted you.

And that’s not what I meant to do

But please tomorrow don’t bring Jesus

Unless to serve me wines and cheeses